During a recent deep cleaning and purging moment, I realized the sofa in my Rolfing® waiting room looked tired and screamed to be replaced. I had not noticed it before, but that day, just as clear as day, I knew I couldn’t wait another second to replace it.
I wasn’t thinking about the time it would take to find the proper replacement or the money and the wait involved. I needed it, and I needed it now. How did I not see it before? Did others notice it looked worn? Was this once-perfect sofa now destined to be free to the first person to appear with a truck?
Is It Really That Difficult?
I started the search for my new sofa and quickly realized it might be a larger task than expected. Stores that sell in-stock merchandise that can be delivered in two days sell trendy colors that were not in my color palette. Ordering a new sofa in the right color, size, and fabric could take up to twelve weeks – that felt like an eternity. Another issue was that a lot of new furniture was not the size I needed. It needed to replace what I had and not precipitate a drastic redo of the entire space.
But Wait…A Miracle?!
The fourth store I went to was the most unexpected and magical place. The salespeople at the first three stores I visited tried to talk me into a larger piece that did not fit my needs. The colors were all wrong, and I was led to believe I wanted something that did not exist; that is, until I happened to see this store that I had never seen before as I was driving home from a disappointing shopping experience at two stores I regularly saw advertised.
The salesman was polite and showed me what I was looking for within a minute. When I asked about the other colors it came in, he pointed to a wall of fabric that took up an eight-foot span and was three layers high. Within seconds, we found the color that blended perfectly with the pillow I had brought in, and within ten minutes, I signed the contract and gave my deposit. I would have my ideal sofa manufactured and delivered within thirty days.
You Do NOT Have to Settle
Previous salespeople had led me to believe that what I wanted was a tough ask and that I would need to settle. That was a familiar old feeling in my life – that I would need to settle. Somehow, my hopes and dreams were too unusual, too specific, or that I was asking for the moon.
Years ago, an old boyfriend told me that my chances of getting married were almost nil if I didn’t stay with him. A then-recent Harvard study had declared that single women in their thirties had nearly as much chance of marrying as getting struck by lightning. I took my chances, left the relationship, and questioned if settling just to have that “married” label was the right direction anyway.
I did not settle back then, and I did not settle for a too-large and wrong-color sofa in December. Where is the possibility of a miracle? Are hopes dashed because we give in too soon?
Manifest Your Destiny
Six years ago, I tripped and fell down the stairs, popping two tendons off the bone in my right shoulder. I needed surgery and lots of physical therapy and endured relentless pain for months. Others who had similar surgeries told me I would not heal fully and that I would get used to the limitations and discomfort. Ugh.
I refused to accept that future and worked to create the future I wanted – a fully restored shoulder with freedom of movement, no pain, and full function. February 28, 2018, marked the last time I RAN down the stairs without holding on to the railing and the last time I moved that quickly without caring for my safety. I did not settle for less than what I wanted – and I now have a wonderful, pain-free, fully rotational shoulder. You can see the theme here!
Dream Big!
Somehow, many of us are not taught to dream big and pursue what we want. Or perhaps we’re unsure of what we wish to strive for. I remember the drizzly, cool day in 1977 when I had my second of ten Rolfing® sessions. In a blessed and insightful moment, I knew this was what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. The clarity just arrived and bonked me over the head. It’s good that I was quiet enough to listen to the “knowing.”
I dreamt big and pursued my passion. Having a conversation with my parents that I was moving to Colorado to study Rolfing® was filled with questions, doubts, and finally, acceptance. I saw my end game and had to go through the steps to get there. I am now in my forty-third year of practice, and I love every day I get to provoke and witness change in my clients.
I urge you to find some quiet time to experience your next dream and to dream big. Expect miracles! I have a new dream, which I will share with you when I have more time to let it perk, resonate, and find resolution. It came to me as I began purging and cleaning out my spaces throughout my home and office. Just as clear as the need for a new sofa was evident, this is the next clear step in my world and personal evolution.
Be open to your next chapter – to finding it and allowing it to appear in the quieter times set aside for you. No one can find it but you. There are seeds planted and hints given – we only need to be still enough and open enough to listen. Have fun on your journey.
Sharon Sklar is in her 43rd year of private practice as a Certified Advanced Rolfer. She has been voted one of Natural Nutmeg’s 10BEST Bodyworkers for the last five years. Sharon works with direct manipulation of the soft tissue of the body and movement re-education over a ten-session series to help her clients feel freer, get more balanced, and reduce chronic pain. Great for athletes, children, and adults recovering from the stress, injuries, or traumas of life. Inquiries are encouraged! State Licensed. Call 860.561.4337 for more info or to schedule a consultation.