Autism Parenting: How Am I Going to Do This?

Autism Parenting: How Am I Going to Do This?

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The months and years following my son’s autism diagnosis were a mad dash to learn and do as much as possible as fast as possible. From scouring the internet in search of information and filling out endless applications and intake forms to meeting with doctors, therapists, and educators, I was always on the go, searching for the next person, program, or medication to help my son.

At various points along the way, some well-meaning people advised me to slow down. “This is a marathon, not a sprint.” While I understand the intent behind the sentiment, it was plain wrong. Marathons have one-size-fits-all routes, break stations, people cheering you on, and a finish line. Autism parenting is exactly the opposite.

For me, it was a never-ending experience of white-knuckling it through the next meltdown, the next IEP meeting, the next new doctor/therapist/medication, the next day.

And after nine years of white-knuckling, the same question kept repeating in my exhausted brain.

How Am I Going to Keep Doing This?
The refrain got louder as my son entered his tween years and things got harder, not easier as I had secretly hoped they would. As the refrain got louder and my anxiety and fear were at an all-time high, I decided to reach out for help.

I tried therapy. And while the therapists were nice, they didn’t know the first thing about autism. I found this so frustrating.

I joined parent support groups. And while it was nice to know that I was not alone, other people understanding my struggles was not helping me manage the challenges of my day-to-day life.

It was not until I stumbled upon life coaching that I finally found something that worked.

Coaching gave me the tools and strategies to challenge my limiting beliefs, understand my triggers, process my emotions, and support myself when needed. And here is what I learned: Autism is hard, and I was making it so much harder by blaming myself, believing every negative thought that popped into my brain and catastrophizing about it, and neglecting my own self-care because I thought it was selfish or a waste of time.

This was, in a way, great news! If I was making the experience harder on myself, then I had the power to make it easier. And so this became my new mission—to answer the question that had been haunting me for years: How am I going to keep doing this?

The answer to HOW is the framework for my coaching program, which is based on my deep belief that while autism may be a part of your life, it does not get to control it—you do. You get to decide how you show up in your life and how you parent, even when your life and parenting look nothing like you wished or expected.

Even then.

You have more power than you think, and I want to show you how.

The Autism Mom Coach is a 1:1 coaching program founded by Lisa Candera, a certified life coach, podcaster, lawyer, and full-time single mother to a teenager with autism. Lisa also hosts a podcast, The Autism Mom Coach, where she shares practical, actionable tips to support parents raising a child with autism. Lisa is currently accepting applications for 1:1 clients. To learn more about my 1:1 coaching program, visit my website and schedule a free consultation: theautismmomcoach.com