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Don’t Fit the Same Old Mold – Find Your Own Unique Style

Don’t Fit the Same Old Mold – Find Your Own Unique Style

When I was in the first phase of my two-part Rolfing® training over forty years ago, I was young, a bit uncentered, and had a hard time staying present in our classroom. While the student practitioners learned how to Rolf their clients, we auditors had to just observe. I was very sensitive to the energies of six people at a time being worked on, and I struggled to stay grounded. I took two-hour lunch breaks instead of the allotted one hour because I was so off-center. My principal teacher didn’t like me, and I could tell. He would answer other students’ questions with flowery words and a smile. He answered my questions with a “yes” or “no” sharp answer and would then move on.

Thankfully, my assistant teacher took me under her wing. And what a big wing it was! Stacy was a sixty-eight-year-old grand dame of a woman. A psychologist, a lover of jewelry and finery, a pillar of social grace with a street-smart adventurous side, you had to listen when she spoke. Her message to me during our course evaluation was, “Find your style.” Thank you, Stacy, for believing in me and for giving me the encouragement I needed to grow, change, mature, and become myself!

I did thank her at that time and several times in the following years before her death at a ripe old age. Through her kind words, she helped shaped me—I didn’t have to fit into anyone else’s mold. I would grow to understand and nurture myself. With that solid footing, I could then help others who are seeking something for themselves and their own well-being. My chosen gateway for this is through my work as a Rolfer.

Rolfing for Change
My Rolfing® clients are people who seek change. Some have chronic pain and issues related to old injuries, surgeries, or past trauma. Starting the process with a 90-minute consultation, I ask questions about where they were raised, about their siblings and parents, their attitudes, and their medical history. I then ask a series of lifestyle questions so that I can begin to understand how they live, what they choose to eat, drink, and how they recreate and exercise (or not!).

Since change is multi-faceted, seeing where YOU are, is the place you start YOUR journey. That journey is different for every person—we are all unique beings. We each have our own history, our own way of seeing the world, and our own set of life circumstances. These events affect the body, the mind, and the spirit of each of us.

Rolfing® addresses change by creating balance throughout the connective tissue of the body over a ten-session series. The bumps, crashes, upsets, accidents, and injuries of life knock us out of balance. We Rolfers use the body’s web of connective or soft tissue as the medium for change. And change does happen.

A recent client wrote this Google review:
“I had a fairly significant complication after having had hip surgery. I sought out our cardiologist and pulmonologist and was told there was nothing else to do. I knew something wasn’t quite right. I could not get air into my lungs and felt as if my body had betrayed me.… I didn’t know what to expect, and I wasn’t going to give up. Sharon provided expertise and a context for healing. She was attentive and intuitive. She literally returned my body to me. I can now breathe with ease and power. I have regained a connection and loving relationship with my body…”

Don’t Force Yourself into Someone Else’s Mold
Over the last forty-two years, I have seen some amazing things happen to the clients in my practice. It’s all about each person finding their own way—finding their own style of self. For many of my clients, becoming pain-free, more fluid, and more aware of themselves and how they use their bodies is life-changing.

I remember sitting on the beach a couple of summers ago, enjoying a book in the shade. There were three beach towels slightly ahead of me. Several minutes later, three girls in their early teens emerged from the water. They were the same age, walked with the same gait, wore the same style of bikini, and had the same long hair. Completely synchronized, they walked up to their towels, flopped down on their bellies, and in complete silence, picked up their phones. There was no conversation, no laughter, no chatting, no movement besides their busy thumbs.

I was struck by their sameness. I remember wondering to myself, when do personal awareness and personal style begin to evolve? We become more socially conscious at around age nine so, until then, we’re in it for ourselves. It’s easier to assume a safe role in the company or in the shadows of others.

My hope for those young women—and for all my clients—is that they each awaken to the power within themselves and find what makes them individuals. That seems to be the goal of a happy life—being quiet enough to hear the messages, obtain inner guidance, and feel personally secure so that we each know and begin to live in our own strengths.

What will you do to uncover that for yourself? Try to live in the question and wait for the answers. Turning off the TV, your phone, and your social media feeds will allow you some freedom to quiet down and perhaps allow the emergence of yourself. You will be pleasantly surprised when you align yourself with those who can help and nurture you to live YOUR truth in YOUR life – finding your style.

Sharon Sklar is in her 42nd year of private practice as a Certified Advanced Rolfer and has been voted one of Natural Nutmeg’s 10Best Bodyworkers for the last four years. Sharon works with direct manipulation of the soft tissue of the body and movement re-education over a ten-session series to help her clients feel freer, get more balanced, and reduce chronic pain. Great for athletes, children, and adults recovering from injuries, stress, or traumas of life. State licensed. Call 860.561.4337 for more info or to schedule a consultation. Inquiries are encouraged!